A Life Change for Louisa

"She is dead! She is dead!"

"Go to him, go to him... For heaven's sake go to him!"

"Oh God! Her father and mother!"

"Yes, yes, to the inn..."

These words whirled around in Louisa's head but meant nothing to her. She did not even recall that she opened her eyes at one point, because she had not yet gained consciousness. And when she woke, she did not even realize that others had initially meant to take her back to the inn, but had instead been routed to the Harvilles' humble home. That is where she was when she opened her eyes with life behind them. And the first person she saw was... a boy!

"Good day to you," she said politely to the lad watching her like a hawk. He only nodded and ran lightly from the room to proclaim to one and all that the angel in Capt. Harville's room was awake. He returned, bringing with him two ladies. "Henrietta!" she exclaimed when her sister appeared.

Henrietta beamed, but did not hug her, as she seemed to wish, if bouncing from one foot to the other in anticipation were any indication. The other lady she did not recall.

"Mrs. Harville, Miss Musgrove, and I am not surprised you do not remember me. We had barely met before your accident and it has been two months since you were awake enough to even consider your surroundings. Now lie still, miss. I need to..."

"Louisa!" Mary Musgrove cried from the doorway. "You are awake! Look, Charles!" she demanded of her husband, who hovered impatiently behind her, as if itching to push her aside.

"Shhh!" Henrietta admonished as Louisa frowned. Mary, as usual, was screeching like a banshee. "Can you not see that Louisa’s head pains her?”

"Well!" Mary said with a haughty toss of her head. "I will not be treated thusly! I am an Elliot! Even Mrs. Harville gave Mother Musgrove precedence before I took her aside and pointed out that I am quite above her!"

"We know!" Henrietta whispered. Louisa would have nodded, but her head ached.

"I do beg pardon for that, ma'am," Mrs. Harville apologized, did but Louisa know it, for the hundredth time since it had happened. "Would you please find Mrs. Musgrove, sir," she said to Charles. "She took the children out for a walk."

"Mama is here?" Louisa found herself asking in surprise. She had not come with them to Lyme. Had something happened at home?

"Did you not hear Mrs. Harville?" Henrietta wondered. "You were injured two months ago. Do you not remember?"

"Impossible! We were here in Lyme, had gone for a walk on the Cobb and Capt. Wentworth so very kindly… Capt. Wentworth? Is he here?” And why should he not be here, when everyone else was?

Henrietta shook her head sadly. “I fear not. Although he did kindly fetch Mama and Papa from Uppercross. And left Anne there.”

“Anne is not here?” Louisa was certain Miss Elliot would have been retained, if only for her nursing capabilities. Anne was so efficient, and if nothing else, could have provided a buffer between Mary and the family. But it hurt her head to think so much and she moaned and closed her eyes for some rest.

“Louisa!” Henrietta exclaimed. “Something has gone wrong!” she urgently appealed to Mrs. Harville. That lady saw Louisa open one eye and shook her head.

“Nonsense. She is merely exhausted. Will you please escort everyone to the parlor, Mrs. Musgrove, and allow me to tend to her quietly until her mother arrives?” It was a polite dismissal, but a dismissal nonetheless. Mary, mollified by the fact that she was to lead the group away, did what was asked without argument, although she had to drag Henrietta with her.

“They are gone now?” Louisa whispered, her eyes still closed, when she could hear no noise.

“Yes, miss,” Mrs. Harville said with a chuckle. “Until the next time. I daresay you will not be allowed much rest now that you have returned to us.”

But fortune smiled down on Louisa. Her parents wished to return to Uppercross for Christmas, and not only had they sent Charles and Mary on ahead, but they were to take Henrietta and the Harville children with them. Her mama had become attached to the captain’s children and thought their high spirits would brighten the halls of her home. And they would be playmates for her grandsons.

“We cannot move you just yet, Louisa,” Mrs. Musgrove said tearfully the morning of their departure. “But we will have you home as soon as may be.”

“Yes, Mama,” Louisa agreed. She was unsure how she felt about not being home for the holiday, but her parents had been generous to the Harvilles all along in the way of provisions, and made certain Mrs. Harville had a stocked pantry and a full purse in gratitude before they went home.

And when they were gone, a silence descended on the residence. Louisa did not know what to do with herself, for Capt. Wentworth had visited only occasionally and mostly when she was not able to receive him. He had apologized profusely for allowing her to injure herself, but she had absolved him from all wrongdoing, even if she did not recall the entire circumstances of the incident. She only knew that accusing him of anything would ruin her chances for marriage, and she could not allow that. Now even that seemed highly unlikely, as he was not even around to captivate with her charm.

Mrs. Harville and her maid were highly competent nurses, but they had other duties and could not remain at her side more than a few moments at a time. Capt. Harville, naturally, was out of the question as far as entertainment was concerned, and she was unsure of Capt. Benwick. After all, when they had first arrived, he had attached himself to Anne.

One afternoon, when the women were busy and Capt. Harville had gone out. Louisa heard a voice in the parlor and she called for whomever it was to attend her.

“Yes, Miss Musgrove?” Capt. Benwick asked politely.  “May I be of some assistance?”

Funny, really, how she did not mind this captain entering into her small room, while she was leery of Capt. Harville, and now Capt. Wentworth. She gave him a wide smile.

“I am bored, sir, and I do not know what to do.”

“Shall I read to you? I could set a chair in the doorway.”

Louisa nodded. “That would be very nice, captain.”

He left and came back with two books and a chair, and settled down just where he said he would.

“What did you bring to read?” she wondered.

“I knew not if you preferred Marmion or Lady of the Lake, so I brought both.”

“Harp of the North! that mouldering long hast hung On the witch-elm that shades Saint Fillan's spring…” she quoted, determined that Anne Elliot not be the only lady capable of such things. Actually, it was all she recalled of the poem, but it would not do to run off her only entertainment.

“Lady of the Lake it is, then,” he replied with a little smile of his own. 

“You did not go to Uppercross with my family,” she said suddenly, for she knew he had been invited. 

“No. Your brother invited me and promised me sport, but…” He seemed to flounder.

“You did not go because of your Phoebe?”

“I… I do not know why I stayed. Are you not glad now that I have?” he said without a trace of 
teasing.

Louisa wondered if he was always this serious, or if it needed to be coaxed out of him. That was 
something she doubted even Anne could accomplish.

“I am very glad,” she agreed. “Will you begin?”

And so the friendship of Louisa and Capt. Benwick was born. There were times Louisa wanted to 
shake him from his studious demeanor, but mostly she was grateful that he provided companionship
for her – and was a steadying influenceOne day, when she was much improved, he suggested they go
for a walk. Mrs. Harville, who had watched quietly while something blossomed between the two of
them, said they might, as long as Benwick was careful not to get the lady chilled. “As it is windy and
cold today.” 

Louisa, who was torn between going out into the world once more and going insane being cooped up
in the Harvilles’ meager lodgings, could not protest if her nurse said she might go, and was helped 
into outerwear while the captain went to retrieve his coat and hat.

“Where are we headed?” she enquired as they walked toward the water. 

“I think you know,” he said without a trace of a smile.

“I do not wish to walk on the Cobb,” she mulishly replied and dug in her heels.

“You are going, Louisa!” he insisted. “I mean, Miss Musgrove,” he more calmly amended.

“No, you may call me Louisa,” she said in a small voice. “James,” she said, trying it on for size. “And
why should I?”

“Because… Because you need to see that the Cobb holds no true horror for you anymore. And I wish
to be near the sea. You also like the sea,” he said.

Louisa’s heart melted. This kind, melancholy captain was in much the same predicament as she. Both
had lost someone, although she had a feeling the captain’s someone was much dearer to him than 
Capt. Wentworth ever had been to her. They had both lost time in their lives. Again, Louisa’s loss 
was not as great as Benwick’s, but it was a loss nonetheless. They both needed to get back on board 
ship and sail into their futures once more, instead of being dashed continually on the shore like so 
much flotsam and jetsam. 

It was much too introspective a thought on such a bright, sunny day, albeit a cold and windy one, and
she smiled. “Shall we go? The Cobb awaits.”

“I am not an intellectual,” she confessed as they stood near the stairs where she had fallen. “I enjoy
your voice  more than I do the words of the poetry.”

“I gathered as much,” he said solemnly. “But it does not matter.”

“I could never hold a conversation the way Anne does,” she continued, as if he had not spoken.

“I have never compared you to Miss Elliot,” he said truthfully.

“But I am cheerful and can be kind and I…”

“Would make me a good wife,” he finished. “If you will have me. I know I am always spouting off 
poetry.”

“It is charming,” she insisted.

“I am but a humble sea captain.”

“I adore the Navy,” she said in all honesty.

“And while I am rarely home, I would…”

“Make an idea husband. I shall sail with you, and we will be as happy as the Crofts were!”

He took her hand. “May I write to your father?”

“Yes, please!”

But Louisa was announced ready to go home before Benwick could write to Mr. Musgrove, so he 
sent a letter to that fine gentleman, carried by no less than Louisa herself when the Harvilles 
escorted her back to Uppercross.

The reply, naturally, was in the affirmative, and word was sent to Lyme immediately so that Capt. 
Benwick could be included in the visit. He was met there with open arms, and the family set about
 planning weddings for both their daughters, for Henrietta was to marry Henry Hayter. 

Louisa blessed her injury for the first and last time. If she had not been out of her mind, she might
 have ended up with the wrong captain.

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